Decision Fatigue

I'm trying to remember where I heard the term 'decision fatigue'. I believe it was in the book The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg. It's a great book that I highly recommend. The point though is that I realy love that phrase, decision fatigue. It resonated with me so much the first time I came across it. If I remember correctly, the point the bookmakes with this term is that habits allow us to prevent decision fatigue. By having things we do routinely, without thinking, it lets us save all that decision making energy for other problmems.
I frequently find myself exausted from making decisions. When I work weekends, my husband handles dinner. He will sometimes ask if there is anything special I want. I usually answer something along the lines of, "I want to not have to think about it." Then he gets takeout and we are all happy.
When I was recovering from my many surgeries, I had a lot of anxiety about a lot of things. I didn't feel I was coping all that well, and I was supposed to be carefully watching my weight and following so many other instrutions I wa getting overwhelmed. I took advantage of a program my insurance provided to do phone coaching for things like weight, stress management, etc. Some of the problems I discussed with my councler/coach person were very small everyday things, like the stress of figuring out what to do for dinner all the time. She helped me come up with a system to plan ahead weekly so I knew what I needed to do each day. It seems so simple, but at the time I just couldn't make any more decisions. I was seriously fatigued. Even better, small things like this really helped. Way more than I expected them to. To have a plan for everyday things leaves what little decision making energy I have availble for decisions that come up that can't be planned for.

I Have Finished Couch to 5K

Well, sort of finished it anyway. The app I'm using goes by time, not distance. So what I've actually finished is Couch to 30 Min of Jogging. I'm slow, and can't finish a whole 5K in those 30 min. But- darn it - I'm still super proud of this accomplishment. Since the final session in the program, I've been trying to work my way up to jogging for the full 5K distance. The last jog I did, I went for 34 min. Let me tell you, there were days along the journey that I didn't think I'd ever be able to jog non-stop for 30 min, let alone more.

At 34 minutes I still didn't quite hit 5K (3.1 miles), but I'm getting close. When I use various apps or my fitness watch thing I usually start them going as I begin my warm up 5 min walk, and I don't turn them off until I get home, so that includes 10 or so min of cool down walking as well. Some of the programs are easier to separate the walking from the running than others. My pace varies between 11 and 12 min/mile, usually about 11:30ish (I told you I was slow). So I figure if I can jog for 36 min I should be hitting the 5K by then. I suppose one of these outings I should wait to start tracking as I actually begin jogging, and stop when I start my cool down for a better, or at least more precise measurement.

I've been reading articles on advice for newer runners who have just finished C25K about what to do next to continue their training. Most advise against just running your 30 min every other day and say you should vary your distance, your speed, etc. to continue to improve. I've tried following a couple audio type classes that do a sort of interval speed work to help get faster. It's been a bit of a joke, because I'm really going the fastest I can right now, and any slower is a power walk - not a jog at all. I'm not sure an outside observer would be able to detect any difference in my 'fast' intervals vs. my 'easy' intervals. These classes like to talk about going at you're 'race pace'. I keep thinking, "My what now?"

Oh well. I have to start somewhere, right? I didn't know for sure I could jog for 30 min straight. Maybe someday I will amaze myself again and have more than one pace.

I girl can dream.

Dream Kara

Two nights ago I had a great dream.
A little background info for those who haven't been listening to me whine, I mean who haven't followed my medical drama lately. After several surgeries that all seemed to run into complications, I am now recovering well but severely restricted in what I can do. I'm not supposed to bend or twist much and am limited to lifting no more than 5 pounds. This has been going on for nearly a year, with the more extreme restriction in the last 4 1/2 ish months.

So in my dream I was just running all over the city picking up heavy things. Something fell from a crane, and I caught it. Some big thing fell off a truck and was rolling toward some kids, and I ran in and scooped it up. I picked up this huge fish in my arms for some reason. And so on.

Every time I picked something up, expecting praise or thanks, people said to me, "You aren't supposed to do that."

Now, Real Me would have heard this and wilted, probably apologised and slunk away, but not Dream Me. Oh no. Dream Me stood up taller, hands on her hips and said, "But I did it anyway, and I'm awesome!" and jogged away to go find something else to pick up.

I wish I was like Dream Me.

A post for Febuary

I've been thinking about the blog for the past week or so. Thinking I need an idea for a post topic, and coming up empty. I'm in a mild depressions as I'm home from yet another abdominal surgery (hopefully, the universe will make this the last one). The current political mess is also depressing, and perhaps I'm reading too much news as there isn't much I'm allows to do at the moment. Although any news is probably too much right now with the just incredible volume of horribleness coming out of the current government.

I'm also feeling sorry for myself due to my surgery, and slow expected recovery. This, fortunately, is something I have to power to do something about. So I am. Part of that is getting myself back up (mentally if not yet physically) and into a productive routine. Over the past several days, I've made calls that I had previously ignored or procrastinated, my desk is very slowly becoming more tidy, and I got my novel draft transferred to a format I can work on editing both on my desktop or my phone, and edits have officially begun. I'd also like to return to regular blogging. And short story writing. And quilting. And I'd love to learn to use my new loom better. . . and my ukulele. . . and, well, maybe one thing at a time.

In closing, here is an update on my health, since that's something I've shared a lot here. I had a 'small re-occurrence' on the lower of my two big hernias. So that required another surgery, but it was complicated due to the previous repair and the mesh that was already there, etc. My surgeon got a little more aggressive this time since another repair will be next to impossible after this, and he is also very concerned with my activity level in the longer term for my recovery to avoid straining or damaging any part of the repair. That's what has me kinda bummed out. I don't like the thought of never being able to do much physical again. Coming to grips with my new reality. It's a journey.

Mirtazapine in Cats

Bob in his Gryffindor scarf. photo by Kara Hartz

Mirtazapine is a common appetite stimulant used for cats. Over the past couple weeks I've given Bob two doses, and he is eating great. Mirtazapine is used because it works really well. Cats who take it, eat. When you have a sick cat that refuses food for significant lengths of time, despite being offered many tempting options, cat people get frustrated and hopeless feeling. Something that gets the cats eating again is a godsend.

Another plus, for anyone who has tried to pill a cat is that it only needs to be given every 3 days. The hospital where I work now carries a new form of Mirtazapine that isn't a pill, but is a soft dissolving tab. So it dissolves quickly in the cat's mouth as opposed to them needing to swallow it. However, it needs to be given every day.

What is talked about less is a common side affect of Mirtazapine.  Even some of the doctors I work with didn't know about this. Most cats I know who have taken Mirtazapine has some degree of behavior changes. Agitation, restlessness, increased vocalizations and similar behaviors are what I've mostly seen or had reported to me. Knowing to expect, or at least not to be startled by these changes when they happen can keep cat people from worrying that something new has gone wrong with their beloved.

For Bob, the restless is the worst on the first day of his pill and decreases over time. I haven't tried the dissolving tabs with him, but since they don't last as long, I wonder if the side affects would be lessened too. I'd be interested to hear your experience if your cat has taken the daily form.

Bob's level of agitation was so bad yesterday that I started rethinking if I would continue using it with him, but today he is his usual happy self, ad I'm torn. The old dude really needs to eat. *sigh* The stressful life of the elderly kitty guardian.

I Liked Him Better Chubby

Thin Bob. photo by Kara Hartz

He isn't eating enough. I'm starting him on appetite stimulants, but they make him act goofy. Why do cats have to get old?

Bob's Raging Bladder Infection

Bob eating- yea! photo by Kara Hartz

I've been sure that Bob is on death's door for about 3 years now. He gets sick, I'm sure that this is the end because, well he's got a broken spine and he's a thousand years old - how much more can he take, right? But he always pulls through. He is the toughest cat in the history of cats.

The latest episode in this ongoing story: he was eating poorly, and had lost significant weight. I took him with me to work for a bath. That was the only plan. At the hospital I work at we use these disposable cardboard litter pans for cats that are clean and fit well into the kennels without taking up all the space. We don't put much litter in them so the kennel doesn't get too messy if the cat kicks the litter around. I leave Bob's diaper off when I have him at work with me to let his poor bottom air out. When he used his box, it was clear he had significant blood in his urine. (I thought is strange that this didn't show up in his diapers.)

So began the tests. We got blood and urine samples. I was sure his kidneys must be starting to fail because his last bloodwork showed his kidney values in the 'grey zone'. In other words, not yet bad enough to diagnose kidney disease, but not quite a good as we'd like. Shocking, for a 19/20 year old cat, his kidney values came back this time just perfect. Like I said, he's an amazing guy. But he does have a raging bladder infection. He was treated with Convenia injectable antibiotic, which we just learned today from his urine culture that his infection is susceptible to. His attitude has since improved greatly.

I'm wondering if the diaper could be a contributing factor to this development. Might holding the wet diaper near his body encourage bacteria to migrate up into his bladder? I think maybe. We can't discontinue the diaper for Bob at this stage. He really seems to have almost no control at all of his urine anymore, so I will just need to be extra diligent about changing him if he is even a little wet. Unlike a baby, he doesn't complain and ask to be changed.

The other strange thing is - he had barely eaten anything in about a week when I took him to work. Then there, he ate three cans of food that day. The next day at home he didn't want to eat again. So I switched his dish for the paper bowls we use at work (as seen in the photo above) and he started eating again. I thought his dish was somehow difficult for him to eat out of or he decided he didn't like it. Unfortunately, the paper dish solution has not continued to work. He is back to sporadic eating habits. So I'd love some theories or ideas about how to encourage better eating. I'm thinking of trying a flat dish - if a more open paper bowl was easier than his ceramic bowl, maybe a plate will be even easier? Yes, I'm reaching here, but you would too if you loved this cat.

My Abdominal Wall Reconstruction Experience

When I was told I needed a surgery called an "Abdominal Wall Reconstruction" it was a frightening moment. I spent a lot of time trying to find out everything I could about what that kind of surgery entails. It was more difficult than I'd expected. Some articles or chat forums lump it in with hernia repair surgery, and that made it sound like I could be back to normal in a few weeks. I knew from the discussions with my surgeons that this was a much bigger deal.

One blog I found very helpful was this: http://www.notquitewonderwoman.com/surgery-post-1-ventral-hernia-repair-with-abdominal-wall-reconstruction/

If this is something you're going through, she explains her journey very well, and is much braver than me in that she also supplies photos. She also explains how she found her surgeons which isn't something I can speak to since I have Kaiser for my insurance and they have their own in house Abdominal Wall Reconstruction Team. (Who were wonderful! Thank goodness.) This team included a general surgeon and a plastic surgeon, and a nurse practitioner.

I think part of the problem with trying to find information on complete abdominal wall reconstructions is that not every procedure is the same. When I was researching information about my partial colectomy, it was fairly straightforward to find information on what to expect. While there is a lot of variation in why someone might need a colectomy (cancer, diverticulitis, severe Crohn's, etc.) the actual surgery to get the thing out doesn't seem to vary as much.

However, an abdominal wall reconstruction is going to depend on what's wrong with the abdominal wall in the first place. If there are multiple hernias, or just one massive hernia. Where the hernias are. How much good/normal abdominal wall structures there are to work with, etc.

For example, one of my hernias, the one at the site of the original colectomy was low on the left side of my abdomen, right over my hip bone. The surgeons were concerned that hip bone would make attaching the mesh in that area tricky. They warned that the might need to drill into the bone to attach it, but they couldn't say for sure what they would need to do until they were in there. Thankfully they were able to attach it by wrapping the mesh a little further around my side so no bone drilling happened, but that conversation helped me see how each abdominal wall reconstruction is unique in many ways.

The basic gist of reconstruction though, is separating all the muscles and damaged layers of the abdominal wall and rearranging them so they cover the holes from thee hernias, and reinforcing them with mesh to keep it all together.

I'm at about 5 weeks post-op now, and really happy with how I feel. My doctors have warned me at length that my abdomen will never again be as strong as it used to be and I need to proceed accordingly. At this point in my recovery I still have a lot of restrictions on what I am allowed to do. Lifting, bending, twisting, or using my abdominal muscles in any way isn't allowed. I must be careful to never gain weight. People ask me about that a lot. The mesh is holding my abdomen together now. It will always be there. It can't stretch, so weight gain can cause damage to the tissues attached to the mesh, and possibly tear them. Not good. This will be a major challenge for me, but I have no choice but to rise to the occasion.

Recovery is a long slow process. I will see my surgical team again at 3 months and 6 months post op and learn when I can safely do more. Unless there is a problem, then obviously I will go in sooner.

Anyway, I decided to write more about my experience because of how difficult it was for me to find any information when I needed it, and I was so grateful to find the blog linked above. I hope someone out there finds this useful too. Feel free to ask questions if there is something more you'd like to know.

43

As a serious Douglas Adams fan, I had hoped that 42 years old would be a great time for me. Just cause that would be extra fun, and naturally we all want our lives to go well. Major health challenges put a big crink in those plans. So here's to hoping for stronger health and more productivity in general now that I've moved on to being 43. I'm due for a good year. Aren't we all? While the world might be going insane out there, I'm planning to get myself together.

Have a great one folks.

I Lost my Belly Button

I like to picture it in a jar of formaldehyde on a shelf somewhere, but that isn't where it went. More likely it was incinerated as biologic waste a week ago. Regardless, I don't have a belly button anymore. The kids and I were brainstorming ideas of how I could explain to people why I don't have one. One wanted me to say I was an alien. I sort of liked the story that I hatched out of an egg. But the one I like best is that I don't have a belly button because my mother molded me from clay and Zeus gave me life. Now I'm just waiting for this to somehow come up in conversation.

I'm tired and sore, but doing really well all things considered. My big goal of the week is to get some writing done. I'd love to have a new Flash Fiction Friday piece ready this week. So watch for it to see how I'm doing! I'm tired of talking about my health so I probably won't for awhile.

Today is the Big Day

Abdominal Wall Reconstruction Day

Sooner than I had expected, but that's how things go sometimes, don't they. I thought I had considerably more weight to lose, but my surgeons are thrilled with what I've done so far. Trying to organize my life to make sure all my responsibilities are covered while I'm out of commission has kept me busy enough that I haven't spent too much time obsessing about the actual surgery part, which is probably for the best.

I'm hoping to get some writing time in during recovery, but from experience I know when I don't feel well, my brain doesn't flow all that well either. So we'll see and hope for the best.

Wish me luck!

Weight Loss Progress

So the weight loss is going better than expected. I'm down about 15 pounds from May 1st, which puts me on track to be down 25 pounds by mid July. I'm a little worried about muscle loss since I am so limited on what exercises I can do, but I'm putting that into the 'things I cannot change' category and trying not to let the stress of it get to me too much. I am walking a lot, and I enjoy that.

For those interested, I use the Sparkpeople app to track my food and exercise. I think you have to go into the full site to get your goals set up to see the recommended calories a day, etc. but after that I recommend the app instead. The full site is crazy ad heavy so it loads super slow and is generally a pain. But it's all free, so it has that going for it.

Just a couple days ago I hit 190 on the scale, and got very excited that I only have 10 pounds to go! Whoo! Then I thought things through a little further and realized that my reward for losing these last 10 pounds will be getting a horrible surgery that I don't especially want to have, and in that light it is a whole lot less exciting. The flip side is that I don't want to stay the way I am either, as both hernias seem to be causing me more pain and discomfort as time goes along. So surgery it is. Dammit.

What's Up with Kara's Guts?

I know this is the question that's on everyone's minds. That's keeping everyone up at night.

No?

I guess it's just me then.

Still, I'll fill you in anyway because I have already said so much here, and it's going to affect the blog and my making of the things. I'm going to need more surgery. My innards have not been behaving themselves. I've herniated through both my colectomy incision site and my iliostomy site. The hernia at the iliostomy site is rather large. Because there are two hernias and one is a biggie, they can't just repair them like a normal hernia repair. I need an abdominal wall reconstruction.

I'm not going to get into what that all entails in this post, but I may later on. Right now I'm working hard to emotionally come to grips with this new reality. My previous experience with surgery was pretty terrible, and frankly, this sounds like it will be worse.

Right now, I'm in major weight loss mode - much more so than the casual weight loss I was working at before this. Apparently excess weight makes abdominal wall reconstruction much less successful. Over a certain BMI, they won't do surgery at all. I've just crossed down into the acceptable range, but to try to make things go as well as possible, and for this to be as strong a long term success as we can make it, my surgical team (yes, there is a team this time, not just one surgeon) wants me to drop another 20 to 30 pounds in the next 3 months. So that's my focus right now.

Strangely, the drastic weight loss expectations are not what's upsetting me. If the weight loss will make things go better, then I will lose the weight. I want things to go better. I want things to go great. I want things to go as well as any abdominal wall reconstruction has ever gone before in the history of abdominal wall reconstructions. Then I want to never need surgery again for anything.

Is that too much to ask?

Stopping C25K, Starting Camp NaNoWriMo

Just because it's become sort a running (pun intended) gag to post about C25K and NaNoWriMo in the same post - here we go:

I've recovered enough from my cold to breathe well enough to start C25K (Couch to 5K) back up again - but - I'm having other symptoms that make jogging very uncomfortable. I have another doctor appointment to find out more specifically what's going on, but in the meanwhile I will report that I'm apparently having further complications to my earlier colectomy and illeostomy reversal surgeries. There is very likely another surgery in my future. While I am not technically restricted by my doctors from running, it doesn't feel good, so I'm going to stick with walking and biking for now. There will more to report on this front soon I'm sure.

Camp NaNoWriMo started at the beginning of April. The difference between the camps and the official November event is that for the camps (in April, and I think July?) you set your own word count goal, or you can set a different type of goal, like for editing or some-such.  I've been preoccupied with taxes and lots of doctor appointments so I've written almost nothing toward the goal of 12,000 words I've set for myself. This week is technically spring break for our charter so I hope I can get in extra writing time since the girls will not need me for teaching as much. However, we still have a lot of group events and outside classes that will take up time, so I'm not going to get too excited about how much free time I'll end up with.

There we are.

Ab Strengthening Setback

As a follow up to my post a few days ago regarding my search for ab exercises that wouldn't hurt all my abdominal scars - I guess I'm back to looking.

I must have strained or otherwise done something bad because I have found myself in significant abdominal pain for the past several days. All my ab muscles hurt, all over. Otherwise I might have been concerned there was a medical problem. At times on Friday, I was near tears with the pain. Yesterday was a little better, but only a little. Today is much better, and no longer feels like something is seriously wrong - now my abs feel like an overworked sore muscle.

This is a frustrating setback because of how little I was actually doing with my exercises. There really isn't all that much I can cut back on. Do three reps of the pathetically easy exercises instead of six? Seriously, that's about all I could handle doing in the first place. Will doing less even be enough to start building up any strength at all?

Grrrr.

Perhaps tomorrow I will hunt up a yoga routine that includes some ab work and try the ab specific exercises again in a few days. Now I'm not only out of shape and wimpy, I'm scared too.

I Didn't Mean for it to Become a Trend

I'm six weeks post-surgery now, so I'm allowed to start exercising and doing things again. So I've started up my Couch to 5K running training program. Today, I was looking over my outline as I prepare for NaNoWriMo. Then I realized I had linked these two events together yet again.

http://karabucreations.blogspot.com/2016/03/couch-to-5k-is-my-fitness-nanowrimo.html
http://karabucreations.blogspot.com/2016/06/couch-to-5k-and-nanowrimo-again-and.html

When I wrote those two previous posts, I'd thought it was sort of a humorous coincidence, and I liked the similarity in the determination and self -discipline I needed for both activities. I didn't mean to forever attach them to each other.

I'd really love to believe this is the last year they will be attached. Not because I don't love them both. I just hope to stay well enough to not need to restart Couch to 5K from the beginning again. The other times, I knew I wouldn't be able to finish the program due to health restrictions. Now, however - I hope I remain hale and hearty and running well past the end of the program. If anything, maybe I'll be looking into a program to take me from 5 to 10 K next year. A girl can dream.

I do plan to keep participating in NaNoWriMo ever year because - why not?

The Ileostomy Life

While I've only had my ileostomy for about six weeks now, so am far from being an expert, it really hasn't been as bad as I imagined. Originally, the ostomy was presented to me as a worst-case scenario if my surgery went poorly. So when surgical complications piled up and I did need the ileostomy after all, that's how I saw it. Worst-case. Clearly, there could have been many worse surgical outcomes than this. My intestines could have been beyond saving at all and I may have needed a permanent ostomy. I could have died. That would be worse. All in all, having this bag isn't all that bad.

Admittedly, the first week home was rough. I was changing the bag just like I was taught in the hospital, but I was getting leaks in the middle of the night. So while moving around was still painful and difficult I'd be up but groggy in the middle of the night trying to put on a new bag and cleaning up all the poop that I leaked out in the bed and the floor on the way to the bathroom. I'll be honest - there were many tears.

In retrospect I should have called the ostomy nurse when I started having problems, but I had a recheck appointment scheduled later in the week, so I just suffered until then. My advice if you are a new ostomate - don't just suffer. These nurses who specialize in ostomy care are great. They have solutions. Go get their help.

After my surgical recheck I explained my leaking problems and they got me in to see an ostomy nurse right then. She didn't have enough of a schedule opening to do a lot of teaching with me, but she looked at my bag (the seal of which was just on the border of leaking right then despite it being a new bag I'd put on the night before) so she could see my problem clearly. She got me a different kind of bag the had a more rigid and curved area where it attaches. I apologize that I don't have all the terminology and lingo down yet. It might be what I've seen referred to as a convex bag? She also wiped on some sort of sticky skin protecting liquid and added an additional sort of jelly barrier ring and sent me home with supplies to do the same. I haven't had a leak since. Even though it's been more than four weeks leak-free, I still have some paranoia about it and still sleep on a towel - just in case.

A week later, I got even more refined help with my scheduled ostomy checkup - including a support belt/corset thing that holds the bag tight against me and makes longer walks much more comfortable. Walks have helped me start to regain my strength so this has been wonderful. And I wouldn't have known about any of these options without those great nurses.

While I certainly won't miss my ileostomy bag after I have my reversal surgery, after that rough first week home, it hasn't been bad. Some things have been interesting - seeing how my innards work in a new way.

Somewhat off topic - I have thought to myself, as all these crazy bathroom laws show up around the country, how happy I am to live in California. Sometimes, if a toilet isn't very big, I have difficulty emptying the bag sitting down and I have to stand up. I wonder what would happen to me if someone saw my feet under a stall pointed the wrong way as I emptied my bag (it's mainly liquid and sounds that way). There are so many reasons not to judge or make assumptions about others.

Couch to 5k is my Fitness NaNoWriMo

I participate in NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month for the theoretical person out there who doesn't know) every year, even when I know I don't have the time or the energy to win. I just like to play. Mostly, I don't hit my word goal.

Couch to 5K (or C25K since we all like to use the lingo, right?) is a running program that takes someone from not being a runner, to being able to run a 5K. I completed the program years ago and was so proud of myself. Then I hurt my foot and stopped running. Last year, when I was fed up with feeling crappy all the time I decided to start up again.

Things were much tougher for me then. I was very overweight and out of shape. After the first couple weeks of the program I had difficulty progressing, so I did each week twice before I felt strong enough to move one. I ran super slow. Most people could probably walk at the pace I was 'running'. But I was still proud of myself.

Then I got lazy, and we went on vacation, and I generally neglected my running. Still, I wanted to do it, so I started over. That time I did better and got really close to finishing the program. . . and then I thought I had the flu, but actually had a perforated colon and got to spend some time in the hospital. It took longer than I expected to gain any strength back, but when I did, I started C25K all over again. My colon responded by acting back up again. Stupid colon.

Now I'm on the week 3 runs - for the fourth time in the past year, even though this time I knew going in that I would not be able to finish the program. That trouble-making colon is coming out in a couple weeks so I won't be running for a bit as I recover.

So why bother restarting the training? The same reason I can't not do NaNoWriMo. It makes me feel good. I'm proud of myself when I do it. Even though my efforts and results are not exciting compared to what I see others doing, they are pretty great for me. So after surgery, when my doctor says it's safe - I'll be starting my fifth attempt to get through the Couch to 5K program. Hopefully that will be the one I finish.

Oh - and, I'm signed up for Camp NaNoWriMo 2016 in April. I'm 'karabu' over there. Camp NaNoWriMo is similar to the November event, except you set your own word goal, and it doesn't have to be all on one novel; any project is fine. Stop by and say Hi if you're writing too!

May Health Update

Frankly, I'm pretty depressed about my weight loss efforts. I thought I was sticking to the plan very well. Missing my calorie goals occasionally, but hitting it most of the time. Over 90% on target there. Keeping up my walks, and adding in at least 3 days of 1 hour sessions at the gym with weights and cardio.

Then I got on the scale. I lost a whopping 3/4 of a pound.

It's depressing.

I've also been measuring, because every weight loss expert I've ever read, or listened to, or heard about says to, but I don't know if I'm doing it right. Apparently I've lost about an inch and a half around my waist, and an inch from my hips. I'm just no confident I'm measuring in the right place, or even in the same place every time. It's a problem with a big tummy and no obvious waistline.

Regardless, all this work is supposed to be good for me, so I'll keep it up. I'm more exhausted than ever, but I do't know what else there is for me to do. I don't want to stay how I am. So. . . onward.

How the Health Thing is Going

The Health thing is trucking along.

Slowly.

I keep reminding myself that slowly is good. I've done fast in the past, and. . . well, since I'm doing it again now it didn't work for the long haul now did it? Down two pounds the last time I checked, which was a week or two ago. More importantly, I'm exercising almost every day, 6 out of 7 at least, and doing more than just walking all the time, but still walking too. Yoga classes two to three times a week, and using the resistance bands I got for Christmas are all giving me a good variety of exercises I hope.

I'm not going full vegan, but I've tried to have a vegan day or three each week. I've learned a new soup recipe that I really love (and will be coming up soon on another podcast review post). The funny thing about my vegan days is that it's easier to walk away from a late afternoon cravings, like for chocolate or something similar because I don't want to ruin my vegan eating day for it. Then the following days, having cheese feels so decadent, I don't want the junk as much anyway. I didn't expect that to happen, but I'm happy.